Probate Etiquette – Because Y’all Don’t Know How To Act

As you might already know, it’s Probate Season out at FIU and because we know that whenever there are a lot of you all, there’s bound to be ratchetness. So because we care (and don’t really want to see a GDI/uninformed Freshman get stomped out), we compiled a few tips on “proper probate etiquette.”
(Note: yes, we inquired with actual greeks, so miss us with the subtweets and sodium, kids.)

Balloons To The Back
There’s nothing worse than being behind that proud friend of a probater with all of Party City’s balloons blocking your view. If you have balloons, find someplace that you aren’t obstructing anyone’s view. Otherwise, you might end up with few less of those expensive balloons.

Be Discreet
First, look up the word “discreet.” Secondly, adhere to it! The point of the probate is to surprise the crowd with the unveiling of the new members. We don’t need you being over zealous and spilling the beans – especially if it’s a boring show! It’s like telling the end of a very long movie just because “you already know what’s gonna happen and can’t keep it in.” If you know who’s coming out, just say “YAAAAAASSSS NUMBER __,” “I see you number __,”and the like.

Find Some Chill – And Hold On Tight
Be mindful of what you tweet. Don’t “play greek” in public. Keep the public salt, shade and slander to a minimum (or don’t – we like to laugh, too). Move away from the camera people in the front. Just be smart.

Come Prepared
You will be standing up for at least an hour (depending on where the show is) for free, so be sure you’ve done the following: BATHED, put on an ample amount of anti-perspirant, put on comfortable shoes, charged your phone, brought your camera, and maybe an umbrella. It’s better to be safe than musky, wet, and have a dead battery.

When It’s Over – Clear It!
As soon as you hear “thank y’all for coming out, have a nice evening,” and you see the DJ start breaking the equipment down, you have about two minutes to vacate the area until the squad cars pull up and tensions rise. By this time, you’ll know whether or not T.G.I. Friday’s (or Denny’s, Taco Bell, Building K or L) is the move, if and where the after party will be, and which neo you’re thirsting for you want a picture with. Fight that urge to create a Let-Out, and you’ll be good (and not under arrest).

So in the spirit of serving our community (and preventing harm from coming your way), this is what we at This Is NOT UM feel you all should know, so that we as the 12% (and others) can enjoy this premier occurrence, and turn up together in peace.


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